Dear Joe,

I’m Antoinette, 20, and a graduating student from one of the university in Manila. I'm a bit confused and hurt at the moment. I've been with Kelvin for 2 1/2 years now. We met in college and started as friends. Our friendship eventually blossomed into a beautiful romance.

Kelvin was my first boyfriend and we were so happy during our 1 1/2 years together . After quite sometime I realized that he doesn't know how to take care a woman. I was the one usually makes the first move and makes the decisions in our relationship. But , in spite of that I have learned to love him even more.

After 2 years, our relationship became boring. I guess I got tired of waiting for him to be sweet to me. There were times that we don't know what to talk about anymore .Everything became a boring .I knew he was also tired of our relationship so we decided to cool-off. I was devastated because I didn't understand why our beautiful romance suddenly turned cold and bitter.

After a week we got back together and tried to work things out. But, it was not the same anymore. I felt that he was hiding something from me but I just kept quiet. I found out that he usually goes out late at night without telling me. Some of my friends would tell me that they usually see him in night clubs. .It didn't bother me that much until one night I saw him with a another girl. I was so mad that I ended our relationship right then and there . He went after me and explained that she was just a friend and he was just
taking her home. He begged me to come back and promised that he would now ask my permission if he would go out . .I believed him and gave him another chance.

But, almost everyday, he would be out late and come home early in the morning. I was paranoid but I kept silent because I didn't have evidence that he was doing something bad. Sometimes I will see some little things that can be very suspicious but he always denies it. He became extra nice to me for months and he usually gave me flowers. Some say that if a guy is acting extra nice it’s because he’s doing something bad behind a girl.

Last 3 weeks, my prayers had been answered. I caught him and that time he couldn't deny it to me anymore. I avoided him but he pleaded me to hear his explanation. When I agreed to talk to him he told me everything about the girl. He said that she was a club girl and he was going out with her everynight because she gives her something that he knows he can’t get from me because he respects me.—sex .

Joe, I did nothing but cry, I was so hurt. He told me that he loves me very much and if given another chance , he promised that he would change and he would never leave me because he can't live without me Joe, I love him so much so I agreed. My friends told me that I was stupid and that I should break up with him.

I already forgave him but the pain is still there. The trust is already gone. Sometimes I would ask myself what have I’ve done wrong. Maybe I loved too much. Some say that going to clubs and flirting with the girls there are natural to guys. Is it true?

I can see his sincerity and he is showing me that he is changing but still I’m afraid. But if I won't give him another chance, I might regret it someday. We are still together now but I feel so alone and when I remember it, I would just cry.

Joe pls. help me what to do. I love Kelvin so much and I can't stand the thought of losing him. Is it worth giving him another chance with all the pain he caused me?

Truly yours,
Antoinette